Skip to main content

ReBlog - World Mental Health Day - 2017

This Blog post was originally written in January 2014... I think a lot of it still applies except I know my illness a lot better now. I've accepted that we are going to have to ride the wave of depression and the most important thing i've learnt is that there is always hope. I still worry about how i'm perceived but this only applies to my boys... I want to protect them from this for as long as I can. Of course they've seen me wracked in pain but Mental Pain is a harrowing sort i'd like to protect them from.

Without further ado,

Loneliness 


Often I want to pour out how I feel about my mental health and to be honest I feel overwhelmed because no amount of semantics will do justice to the mess that's within me. I however feel like "loneliness" covers most of it. When I am within the grip of depression, I feel Unreachable. No one can reach me (though some try - my hubby & a few trusted friends) and I can't reach anyone either. I do try but the weight is too heavy to lift.
I decided to write this out today because Time to Change the charity working tirelessly to end stigma surrounding mental health launched their new campaign this week.
I watched a few clips and it made me look within and I found that I was actually worried about how people will perceive me if I give them a glimpse into my head. I realise that this in itself is helping perpetuate the idea that mental illness is something to be ashamed of. It's not.


I am not ashamed I have a mental illness. I am however sad that I do.
I think because I have this reputation of being happy go lucky/ gregarious , when I have bad days and I can't keep my facade up, some people don't know how to react. Someone once suggested my depression was nothing but a bit of winter blues. I don't think the person meant to
poo-poo my pain though, it just came out like that.
Everybody has days when they want to say F- You world I am staying in bed. However if you notice that your friend isn't being her self lately give them a text to let them know you care. Offer them some help.
It'll mean a whole lot to them.
Start a conversation about mental health in your community.



Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Got An Answer: My Rheumatoid Diagnosis

Back in the spring when I started having what I can only describe as the worst pain ever, I didn't know how things would pan out for me. I've been through some really dark times (even for me .. *titter* ) I went from full pelt Half Marathon Training (my last run being just over 10 miles) to hobbling out of bed and struggling with the stairs.



The worst thing for me was aside from my obviously painful swollen ankles, I looked the same. It didn't seem like my whole body was on fire. The crippling fatigue & worst still the shroud of hopelessness that engulfed me.

I didn't miss one day of work even though some days i'd rather be knocked out than endure one second of the day. I still did the parent thing. The partner thing. The business owner thing.
I now know better because yet again, I pushed through and would end up crashing at weekends.

It all started with a mass in my breast. I wrote about it here & explored more here.

 To catch up, read the posts between t…

RED January

I did RED January and here's what I learnt: 

January is a long brutal month so getting outside is a prerequisite to survive it. 


It's wet & some of your usual routes may not be the best at this time of year! 



Most of the time you'll have to run in the dark but you'll love it anyway - Be Safe, Be Seen! 


Sometimes you get the best of the Winter Sun and everything just clicks into place.


You get braver and end up going to Park Run for a strong finish, your limbs hate you but your mind loves you. 
I'm training for a half marathon as you know so I made it through January by Walking, Running, Pilates, Yoga & Rowing. 









How the eff is this my life? - Moving Forward After a Hard Knock.

Do you ever have those days when all you can say is “how the fuck is this my life?”
Sometimes said in a Wow! I’m killing it but mostly said in bewilderment. I try and be present and aware of  what’s happening around me & within me, however I’m also guilty of zoning out and getting through my days in a perpetual daze. Occasionally you look up and you are stunned at what your life has become.



When this happens, you may be anxious or feel helpless about where you’ve ended up. Either through your own choices or the cards you’ve been dealt. I just wanted to write today, it’s never too late to make changes in order to achieve the life you want.

I’ve been saying that phrase lately but I know that life changes and we’ve got to adapt the best way we know how. So for me, I know with my new diagnosis, I can’t take on as much like I used to.
I need to give myself wiggle room in my schedule. I have to be kind to myself and say no to things I really want to do so I can function better. I need …