Skip to main content

It’s not Cancer.


Thank fuck for that!
Honestly, worst week in terms of anxiety. I can normally hold my shit together in public but on Thursday , I needed a walk around my office block as I was so agitated. I got to the appointment & the consultant said my results were clear where cancer is concerned. My anxiety was reduced quite drastically.


Turns out my theory is correct.
It’s my old friend - Hidradenitis Suppurativa (whatever you do, do not Google images!)



I say HS for short. I thought it might be draining from my armpit to my breast tissue which caused this mass to form. 

I’m sad as I honestly don’t know when I’ll be back running. I don’t know when I’ll feel like myself again. I’ve had a few days to wallow, but I’ve decided that I’ve got to make plans to get back to an ok version of where I was. My immune system is totally kicking my arse. I have gone from Half Marathon ready to struggling with stairs in two weeks. This is no April Fools. It's trying to overwhelm me. But I cannot let it. 

I’m going to make Yoga & Pilates my new focus - they were my backing dancers when running was lead. I’ll walk a lot more i.e. replace running (for now) 

That’s all near future stuff though. Once bank holiday is through, I’m going to see about this mass (it’s nothing scary but it’s still painful AF), give my gynaecology a break (whilst deciding if I want to accept next step on my treatment plan) and find a way to stop my joints from hurting so much.

I’ve also spoken to my hubby and I must admit he’s right, I do have to take stock of my life and de-stress/un-busy it. 



There’s a reason I like planners, you get shit done with them. 

Here we go.





Comments

Popular posts from this blog

What to put in your Hospital Bag for a Mastectomy

I have scrawled across the internet , read lots of blogs and watched lots of videos. Most of which were of an American slant. I have come to the conclusion that the American hospital system is very different to our good old NHS. I asked lots of people who have been through this too. I also used information from the booklet entitled "Planned Admissions" which I was given when I went in for my Wide Excision back in March.  Putting all the above to use, here is what I have packed in my hospital bag . Most British hospitals do not have vast amount of space so you are advised to bring a soft bag not a suitcase. I chose my favourite Cath Kidston X Disney Peter Pan Tote. It's not a big bag either. George Post Surgery PJs (with internal drain management pockets. George Post Surgery Dressing Gown (also with Drain Management) My trusty bedroom boots Fleece Blanket Spare underwear Toiletry bag containing Toothbrush, Toothpaste, Deodorant, Face cream Naty Baby Eco Wipes

Films I'm very Excited to Watch in the Next Few Months (and why you should be too)

 If you didn't know this about me, I LOVE the cinema! I go pretty often, and film premiers feature heavily in my planners! So after lockdowns, the cinema industry is struggling to get back on its feet. Cineworld is even teetering on bankruptcy. As an unlimited card holder, this is such sad news, and I hope they can pull through. However, it is not all bad news as the film industry has some corkers coming up!  After the D23 Expo , there are a lot of good films coming out of the Disney/Pixar studio. I will not be listing them here, but I've popped a link you can visit to see. I'm incredibly excited about The Little Mermaid coming out in the Spring (2023).  Talking about Disney magic, This next film has been 30 years in the making. I'm excited to kick off Halloween 2022 with Hocus Pocus 2! It's being premiered on Disney+ on September 30, 2022. I'm away for work but I will be catching up with my hubby when I get back. I'm scared of the Sanderson sisters 🤣. Ther

Double Mastectomy Recovery - No Reconstruction (The First Few Weeks)

I meant to write this blog around the week 2 mark but i'm kinda glad I waited. This will give an overview of what my experience was like. I think it is important to note that, we are all different so my experience may not look the same as yours. Day 1 A few hours after Surgery I came round to a heavy-ish feeling in my chest and feeling very hazy from the anaesthetic. I hadn't eaten all day so I had some toast at about 6ish. I slept the evening away. I had 3 drains in. I did my first wobbly steps around the ward to use the bathroom. Pain wise , It wasn't as bad as I expected. I only needed paracetamol. Day 2 I felt more human, still tired but in good spirits. my arms felt restricted, I also had a wide dressing all around which i think contributed to that feeling. I got to go home that afternoon. I used my Jen's Pillow for a smoother ride home. That night, I had major anxiety about sleeping in my own bed with my drains. I had images of drains tugging at