I’m scared

im sorry for the vague blog post. This is a mind dump. There are times when I forget until I remember. I feel like I’m in Limbo at the moment . My plans, dreams & hopes have a question mark. I’m trying to be normal & go about my routine but I’m scared shitless.

All I know is that it gets overwhelming at the moment whilst I wait. There’s this metaphorical bomb. I can feel it.

The waiting is the hardest bit.

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What to put in your Hospital Bag for a Mastectomy

I have scrawled across the internet , read lots of blogs and watched lots of videos. Most of which were of an American slant. I have come to the conclusion that the American hospital system is very different to our good old NHS. I asked lots of people who have been through this too. I also used information from the booklet entitled "Planned Admissions" which I was given when I went in for my Wide Excision back in March. Putting all the above to use, here is what I have packed in my hospital bag . Most British hospitals do not have vast amount of space so you are advised to bring a soft bag not a suitcase. I chose my favourite Cath Kidston X Disney Peter Pan Tote. It's not a big bag either. George Post Surgery PJs (with internal drain management pockets. George Post Surgery Dressing Gown (also with Drain Management) My trusty bedroom boots Fleece Blanket Spare underwear Toiletry bag containing Toothbrush, Toothpaste, Deodorant, Face cream Naty Baby Eco Wipes

IRL: Crafty Catch Up 2017

Well what can I say? My first ever planner meet up was all I thought it would be! I had an absolute ball. I had wanted to come to the last one but being an islander meant it was just too far for me to consider however things changed when this date was announced. 22nd July was only a few days away from our wedding anniversary. We'd planned to spend it at Disneyland Paris so it made perfect sense to do the crafty catch up on the Saturday, and then continue on to France the following day. Serendipity. What I didn't account for was the mania that it would entail. Kids breaking off for summer Friday afternoon, finishing packing, cleaning the house etc , getting the 7am ferry, driving to Kent, etc on the Saturday. As I arrived, I saw the beautifully laid out Lydd Community Hall. In the hallway was the table plan, I was on table 3... I met great people! I was reminded that all kinds of people love crafts, I was inspired by their creativity Specifically the mummy/daugh

Letter to My Dear LJ - You are growing up!

My Dear LJ, Honey, you are growing up. It scares me to admit it but its true. There are signs everywhere pointing to the fact that you are no longer the chunky baby i used to sling everywhere. Last night I had to do a double take because lying next to me, you seemed longer. I thought it was your brother. My darling, your fierce demands to be independent have always been heard. Right from when I met you, you let me know that you will always march to the beat of your own drum. Everything in my parenting toolkit was blunt and useless, I had to learn different ways of parenting you. You my rainbow baby, refused to be molly cuddled. I wanted to keep you wrapped up and safe. But you longed to explore the world in your quiet but steadfast way. You are doing it. I'm so proud of you. It's only preschool another voice in my head shouts. Your mother is and will always be a sentimental soul. This is the first step to you having a separate life i'm not part of. I hope you ha